My Estranged Dad

Jul 14, 2020

I heard my Dad had a heart attack when I was 23 years old. He had been estranged for years. As I frantically dialed several relatives trying to get his number, I made a decision that day if he lived; I would learn to forgive the past and get to know this elusive being. Turns out the heart attack was a misunderstanding, but thankfully landed me at his front door just the same.

There he was, this beautiful human who reached his arms out to me and whispered in my ear, “I thought I lost you forever, Mija.”

For the next twenty three years he was my best friend until he passed. Along the way our family healed and forgave one by one looking forward, enjoying his hilarious stories, and in his own way, love.

I have missed so much his intelligence and our lively political debates during election years. Mostly I miss his need to tell jokes and make me laugh.

I share this today because I know there are estranged Fathers out there who love their children, but for their own reasons could not express their doting love when their children were young. I see you. Life is complicated. ❤

You are still a Dad as long as you are breathing, and I hope you will spend the rest of your days, like my father did, gently, making amends where they are possible. Birthday cards are everything, and I cherish the ones I received.

I had the best Dad ever for 23 years, and I can say wholeheartedly - it was worth the wait.  Here he is with my eldest son. :)

There are a million different reasons we make mistakes, but I imagine it is never because we don’t love or want the best for our children. Sometimes we just don’t know how to work it out, and lacked any kind of role model. Other times it’s because we are suffering ourselves. Intention speaks louder than thunder. Baby steps.

Penny is a CHPC, Life Coach and a Mystic who enjoys sharing hard earned, inspired wisdom, with anyone seeking a clear mind and a fresh outlook. When she’s not spending time with her Family and friends, or facilitating Inspired Groups for Gals, you can find her reading in the backyard with her doggy, Sydney.

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Penny Sisley, CHPC, Life Coach, Mystic